


Love Letter

by revebaby



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, Idiots in Love, Minor Ha Sooyoung | Yves/Kim Jiwoo | Chuu, Mutual Pining, One Night Stands, haseul and vivi are married, haseul is a vocal teacher, jinsoul is a singer, jungeun is a singer, yeojin is haseul and vivi's daughter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:41:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24059920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revebaby/pseuds/revebaby
Summary: Jung Jinsol is in love with one of her best friends. In fear of ruining their friendship, she decides to bury it deep within her. She resigns that her true feelings will only come out in her songs.She's in the process of writing one of these love letters when Jungeun knocks at the door.(Inspired by Love Letter by Jinsoul and Kim Lip.)
Relationships: Ha Sooyoung | Yves/Kim Jiwoo | Chuu, Jo Haseul/Viian Wong | ViVi, Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 10
Kudos: 228





	Love Letter

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first loona fanfiction and there will probably be more to come since they're one of my ults, so i hope you enjoy this even tho its different to what i usually write pls stream love letter and enjoy!!

Jung Jinsol is pretty sure she’s in love.

It’s not a new revelation. She’s reminded every single time Jungeun is on that stage like she is tonight, strumming a simple but beautiful tune on her guitar, singing lyrics about love---lyrics about loving someone else, that is.

Occasionally, she’ll look over to where Jinsol stands, waiting for her time on stage at the bar they sing at, and she’ll make this expression, gaze so intense that it’s like Jinsol is the only person she can see, like the lyrics are made for her.

But then she turns back to the rest of the crowd and Jinsol pulls herself back to reality. The bar isn’t usually very crowded and it’s a Wednesday night tonight. Of course their eyes would meet at some point. It probably means nothing.

(It doesn’t stop her from wondering.)

There’s scattered applause and Jinsol looks up from her drink to find that Jungeun’s song has finished and she’s smiling and bowing to the crowd. Jinsol downs the rest of the glass. Alcohol isn’t great for your throat when you’re singing, but her lyrics are far too emotionally charged and she wouldn’t be able to get them out without it.

‘You were late today,’ she hears a voice come from behind her. She chokes a little. 

Jungeun has appeared behind her, still in her work clothes, beads of sweat forming on her brow from the harshness of the stage lights. 

‘Sorry. I was babysitting for Haseul. She and Vivi got off work late.’

Kim Jungeun crosses her arms. ‘I got here early to see you sing, then they told me I had to go on instead of you.’

Jinsol feels her heart beat out of rhythm for a second. ‘You can still see me. I’m going on soon.’

‘I wish I could.’

‘Then why don’t you?’

She frowns for a second and Jinsol immediately assumes this alcohol has given her too much courage and she’s said something wrong.

But, no, the reason for her refusal shows its face just a second later. Her face, rather.

Kim Jiwoo, who visits almost every gig Jungeun does, throws her arms around Jungeun’s neck, bringing out the biggest smile. They face each other and Jiwoo says something about how _amazing_ Jungeun was up there and she hands over a small bouquet of flowers like she does every single show. Jinsol feels sort of out-of-place watching them.

  
  


Jinsol has learnt that Kim Jiwoo is Jungeun’s very best friend. They’ve known each other since middle school and now they study at the same college. 

If Jinsol doesn’t see Jungeun, nine times out of ten, it’s because she’s studying with Jiwoo, or drinking with Jiwoo, or having dinner with Jiwoo, sleeping over at Jiwoo’s.

They might just be friends. But then, who are Jungeun’s lyrics about? 

Only a person in love could write those lyrics.

She places the empty glass on the bar behind her and orders another, which she downs as well.

‘Jinsol,’ Jungeun’s voice comes, warning.

‘What?’

She says nothing, just gives a look like she’s longing to say something, tell Jinsol to slow down.

But she doesn’t. 

Probably because her lover is right beside her. And that isn’t her place. Not anymore.

‘Jiwoo and I were going to a frat party,’ Jungeun says apologetically.

‘You could come if you want,’ Jiwoo suggests. If she was less kind than she is, maybe Jinsol could hate her. But, no, Jinsol doesn’t have an ounce of hate for either of them. If only she did.

‘I’m good,’ she tells them, though she isn’t. ‘I’ll see you guys another time.’

Jiwoo hugs her goodbye even though they’ve spoken less than ten times. Jungeun just gives her a look as she walks by. Jinsol wonders how Jungeun can make her feel like the only person in the world one minute, then a stranger the next.

(The bartender tells Jinsol that night that her performance was ‘kind of shitty’. How can you sing to someone who isn’t there to hear it?)

\---

‘Frankly, Jinsol, I don’t want your negative energy affecting my baby.’

If you think you have helicopter parents, then you haven’t met Haseul and Vivi, the most helicopter of parents to have ever existed. Jinsol is surprised they haven’t smothered their daughter Yeojin to death already.

‘I don’t have any negative energy,’ Jinsol says, lifting the one-year-old into her lap and making cooing noises at her as she giggles.

‘You do, it’s all over you,’ Haseul insists, hands on her hips. She’s dressed up all fancy in makeup and a black dress because she and Vivi are going out for dinner soon. 

Jinsol insisted on babysitting tonight after her gig. Vivi and Haseul, both insanely busy people, usually jump at the chance to wind down for once and Jinsol likes to give herself something other than Jungeun to think of, so why not?

‘Is it Jungeun?’ Haseul asks her.

‘No,’ Jinsol replies quickly. ‘Why would it be Jungeun?’

‘You know why. Have you spoken since... ?’

‘Yes. Sort of. Not about, like, _us,_ though.’ Shrugging, Jinsol says, ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’

And it’s true. She doesn’t want to talk about it. The only way these words ever leave the tip of her tongue is through songs.

(There’s one more way, involving the tongue of someone else, but Jungeun doesn’t seem to be interested.)

‘Well, if you want, I could set you up with someone from work,’ Vivi suggests from the bathroom down the hall. Her voice is quite soft, so Jinsol has to lean her head in her direction. ‘You could try to get over Jungeun.’

‘Yeah,’ Jinsol says, even though she can’t imagine a relationship with anyone else. ‘Maybe.’

‘How do I look?’ Vivi asks as she comes into the living room from the hallway. She’s wearing a red satin dress that Jinsol is sure she’s seen Haseul wearing before, her hair in perfect waves. Yeojin makes little grabby hands towards her.

‘You look nice,’ Haseul says quietly.

‘Just nice?’ Vivi chuckles, picking up Yeojin and holding her to her chest.

‘No, you look pretty. Really, really pretty. Beautiful.’ 

Haseul moves close to Vivi, her arms around Vivi’s waist so that Yeojin is trapped between them, looking from left to right like she isn’t sure who she should be begging for right now. 

Even though they’re her friends, Haseul and Vivi make Jinsol feel lonely sometimes. She doesn’t think she’ll ever have what they have. Not with anyone she wants, anyway.

She looks away when Vivi kisses Haseul on the cheek. They break apart not long later, having known Jinsol long enough to know when she’s uncomfortable.

‘Okay,’ Haseul says, returning Yeojin to Jinsol’s lap after kissing her nose gently, ‘We’ll be back before midnight. I got out some blankets and extra pillows so you can sleep in the guest bedroom. Make sure you have her in bed by eight. And there’s food for her in the kitchen. And bathe her before---’

‘Haseul. I’ve looked after her before. I know what I’m doing.’

Haseul takes a deep breath. ‘Just… you’ll be okay, right?’

‘Of course,’ Jinsol says, though honestly, she isn’t sure. She pushes Haseul away. ‘Go on. Have fun, you crazy kids.’

They say their goodbyes. The door clicks shut as they leave. The smile Jinsol had on falls from her face.

Haseul and Vivi’s house happens to be a shrine of love, very unsurprisingly. Hanging above the TV is a big picture of them on their wedding day. The rest of the wall is full of pictures of Yeojin at various ages, Yeojin’s grandparents, Haseul and Vivi before they got married. 

Jinsol moves to the kitchen with the baby not too long after, because her mind is beginning to race. 

She sits Yeojin down in the high chair, moves to the refrigerator and takes out a bowl labelled “Yeojin Dinner”. It seems to be some sort of homemade applesauce. As expected, Haseul and Vivi don’t trust ready-made food for their daughter. On the stovetop is a note.

_Jung Jinsol-_

_Please put Yeojin to bed before 8. There’s frozen pizza in the freezer for you. Don’t give Yeojin any even if she begs. We think she’s lactose intolerant._

Jinsol checks. Lo and behold, there is a frozen pepperoni pizza with her name on it. Yes, literally. They’ve written _For Jinsol_ on the box.

So she puts it in the oven even though she rarely has any appetite these days then she feeds Yeojin as many spoonfuls of applesauce as she will take. She’s surprisingly easygoing for a baby and puts up almost no fight at mealtimes.

‘Is it nice being a baby?’ she finds herself asking Yeojin, who can’t understand, as she spoons more applesauce into her mouth and wipes her chin when she dribbles. ‘Everyone loves you. Even if a baby is ugly, everyone loves it. What’s with that?’

Yeojin simply gurgles in response as she finishes off her meal.

‘That’s true. I wish I were like you. Then everybody would love me. Even her.’ She blinks, surprised to have said that out loud. ‘Oh. I get what your mother means by negative energy now. Hey, this would be good as a song.’

She eats two slices of the pizza which is now a little burnt, then bathes Yeojin before putting her to bed, tucking her in and singing her to rest.

Once Yeojin is sound asleep, she settles back in the kitchen with a glass of red wine she found in the fridge. They probably won’t mind.

She comes up with a new song that night. Working title: _If I Were a Baby._

But then she’s scrolling through Instagram, looking through people’s generic captions, trying to come up with the first line because it’s always hardest to get the ball rolling, when she sees it.

It’s Jiwoo’s Instagram. A picture of her and Jungeun in dark lighting and messy makeup. Jiwoo is planting a kiss on Jungeun’s cheek as Jungeun smiles at the camera shyly.

Jinsol feels sick to her stomach suddenly. 

She gulps the feeling down. She likes the photo to be polite and moves her phone away from her like it’s about to explode. She begins to write.

  
  


New title: _If I Were Your Baby._

\---

When the song is halfway done, Jinsol helps herself to another glass of red wine. 

It’s only nine. She wonders if Jungeun is out there having the time of her life right now.

Jinsol sometimes thinks it isn’t fair. Why is it that Jungeun could get over whatever they had the next morning, but Jinsol must suffer for the rest of her life?

Is this how her life will be until the day she dies? Constantly yearning for things she can’t have and for people who don’t want her? 

Jinsol used to read lots of romance when she was younger. She’d thought, by the time she was in college, she’d surely have found the love of her life already.

But no, the reality is never that kind. Even if she has found the love of her life, the love of her life isn’t _hers._ Will never be. She doesn’t think about it much, but it hurts.

Or maybe that’s Jinsol’s fault. After all, wasn’t she the one to catch feelings after a drunken one night stand? 

Except Jinsol knew what she felt for Jungeun was something unusual way before that. She just didn’t want to acknowledge it.

She doesn’t even know. What do you do in a situation like this? She slams the pen down on the table and slams her head onto it next. She hopes she didn’t wake Yeojin up.

Just then, as if to make her situation worse, her phone starts ringing. Very loudly. 

She scrambles to answer it before the baby starts crying. 

‘Hello?’ she says a bit brusquely.

‘Hey, where are you?’

It’s Jungeun’s voice. Jinsol’s heart drops.

‘You’re not at your house,’ she says. ‘I’ve been ringing the doorbell for twenty minutes.’

‘Why are you outside my house?’

‘Nothing,’ she says quickly. ‘I was going to ask if I could stay over. I’m far from my house and I can’t drive, obviously.’

‘Aren’t you staying at Jiwoo’s tonight?’

‘I was supposed to be, but something came up.’

‘What came up?’

‘Jesus, you ask so many questions,’ she says with a chuckle. ‘She took someone home and now I’m stranded. She told me to call you.’

‘She… what?’

‘She told me to call you. I know things are weird between us, but we’re friends, right?’

Maybe Jinsol would be a bit more heartbroken if she wasn’t so confused right now.

‘So where are you? Come let me in.’

A few minutes pass. ‘I’m at Haseul’s babysitting. Come over if you want.’

‘Okay. I’ll be there soon.’

Jinsol hangs up. Suddenly she’s in silence, but her head has never been louder.

\---

Jinsol answers the door before the bell even has a chance to ring. Jungeun blinks a little at her. 

‘Sorry,’ Jinsol says. ‘Didn’t want to wake Yeojin.’

‘Good evening to you too,’ Jungeun says, slipping past Jinsol into the house and taking off her shoes. ‘What’s up with you? Haseul and Vivi’s house haunted?’

‘What?’

‘You look like you’ve seen a ghost.’

Jinsol forces a laugh. ‘It’s nothing. I was having dinner in the kitchen if you want to join me.’

‘Sure. All they had at that party was Cheez-Its, so.’

‘How come you guys left so early? It’s not even ten,’ Jinsol comments as they walk down the hall together, careful to keep her voice down.

‘Somebody Jiwoo knows was there. She left with her.’

‘She left you to go home alone?’

‘Nah, it’s not like that.’ Now that they’re in the kitchen, Jungeun pulls out a chair and helps herself to a slice of cold pizza. ‘I told her to go. I couldn’t mess it up when she had finally made her move. She’s been pining over that girl Sooyoung for the longest time. Like I don’t know what that’s like.’

‘Do you?’ Jinsol asks her quietly as she pours her a glass of water. ‘To be honest, I thought you and Jiwoo were dating.’

Jungeun chokes. Jinsol rushes to pat her on the back until she’s back to normal, the biggest grin on her face.

‘Me,’ she croaks, ‘and Jiwoo?’

‘Yeah. I thought you liked her, at least. Maybe even loved her.’

‘What on earth made you think that?’ Jungeun says with a too-loud cackle. Jinsol shushes her. ‘She’s like a sister to me.’

‘I don’t know. She’s always hugging you and kissing you.’

‘Jiwoo’s like that. She’d be like that to you too if you’d let her. Do you have any ranch?’

Jinsol stands, reaches over to the fridge to fetch a half-empty bottle of ranch dressing. Jungeun squeezes some onto the plate Yeojin had designed with water paint and dips the edge of the pizza crust into it.

‘I’m sorry. I assumed.’

‘It’s okay. You’re not the first person to say that, and you probably won’t be the last. Hey, could I have some wine too?’

‘Is that a good idea? You haven’t eaten much.’

Jungeun rolls her eyes. ‘I’m eating now, so it’s fine. I’m just going to take your glass if not.’

‘Go ahead.’ Jinsol pushes her glass across the table towards Jungeun, who takes a sip then hums in surprised satisfaction. College kids like her do tend to be used to the acidity of vodka instead.

‘Hey,’ she says, looking pointedly at the table. Jinsol matches her gaze and then realizes. She has left her notepad out.

And her lyrics are on full display.

‘Is that a song?’ Jungeun asks, snatching it up before Jinsol can. ‘ _If I Were Your Baby?’_

‘Uh, yeah.’

She spends maybe a whole minute reading and chewing. Then she places the notepad in front of Jinsol slowly.

‘It’s good so far,’ she says quietly.

‘Yeah?’

‘It’s kind of sad.’

‘Well, I’m a kind of sad person,’ Jinsol says with a weak laugh. Jungeun doesn’t return it, she just looks on with quiet concern how she tends to do. ‘Sorry. I think it’s the wine.’

‘I thought you seemed like you’d had quite a bit.’

‘Just two glasses. Or three.’

‘While babysitting. Very responsible of you.’

‘It’s fine. You’re here now.’

They go silent then.

Jinsol wonders how she manages to mess everything up all the time.

‘I thought,’ she starts, though she knows it’s a bad idea, ‘that maybe your songs were for Jiwoo. The way you write, you make it sound like you’re really in love.’

‘Maybe I am,’ is all she says.

‘With Jiwoo?’

‘No, not Jiwoo.’ Another roll of the eyes. ‘Which I thought we’d already established. Someone else.’

‘Who?’ Jinsol asks before she can help herself.

Jungeun stops chewing for a second. She narrows her eyes at Jinsol. ‘Why do you want to know?’

‘Nothing,’ Jinsol says quickly. ‘It’s nothing.’

‘Who are _your_ lyrics about, hm?’

‘What?’

‘Oh, come on, it’s obvious you’re pining after somebody. Wasn’t it what that night was about?’

So Jungeun thinks Jinsol used her to fill the space left by someone else. Did Jungeun do the same?

That hurts. That really hurts.

Jinsol can’t even answer. She just stares at the table like she’s suddenly lost her ability to form coherent words.

‘Wasn’t it?’ Jungeun repeats with a small laugh that falters. Then, seriously, she says, ‘Jinsol, wasn’t it?’

Jinsol looks up to meet Jungeun’s eyes. She has abandoned all pizza by now and her face has taken on that expression again---like there are a thousand words she wants to say but can’t.

‘You can tell me anything,’ Jungeun says.

But Jinsol can’t. Having bottled up her feelings for years, she can’t seem to let them loose again. That’s why she writes music like love letters, isn’t it? 

So maybe Jinsol doesn’t know how to talk anymore, but she does know how to write.

She slides her notepad back over to Jungeun.

‘What?’

‘These were for you.’

‘Me?’ Jungeun’s eyebrows screw up. ‘All of them?’

‘Yep. Every single one.’

She looks through the songs she’s already heard hundreds of times dreadfully slowly. So slowly and so quietly that the only noise Jinsol can hear is her own breath.

She silently wonders if she’s ruined a perfectly good friendship again.

She should have said something. She should have laughed it off. She should throw all of those songs away right this minute and never sing again.

Jungeun shifts. She hands the notepad back. Jinsol’s stomach does a flip.

‘These are really about me? I didn’t realize how romantic they were. They’re like love letters.’

Jinsol shrugs, gaze cast down at her hands. ‘I just wrote how I feel.’

‘Love?’

Another shrug. ‘Maybe. Yes. Love.’

‘You love me?’

A beat. ‘I think I do.’

‘Jinsol, why didn’t you ever say anything?’

‘I don’t know. I knew you didn’t feel the same. And Jiwoo…’

It goes quiet for a second. Then, out of the blue, Jungeun starts to laugh. It’s small at first, but then it turns into a cackle so loud that Yeojin begins to cry.

Jinsol rushes up the stairs and throws open the door and takes the baby in her arms and hushes her until she starts getting sleepy again, then she lays her back down and crouches by the side of her little bed until her eyes close. Then she gives her a little kiss on the forehead and makes to leave.

‘You’re good with her,’ Jungeun comments quietly from the doorway.

‘Yes.’ Jinsol closes the door as slowly as she can, only daring to breathe once there is a barrier between her and a sleeping Yeojin. ‘Don’t wake her up again.’

‘I won’t,’ says Jungeun indignantly.

‘Why were you laughing? What was funny?’

She breaks into a smile. ‘You’re really dense, Jinsol.’

‘That’s not very nice.’

‘But it’s true.’

‘What are you talking about?’

‘Why don’t I just show you?’ Jungeun says and she looks down at the floor for just a second like she’s shy. ‘Since we’re both not very good with words.’

‘Okay,’ Jinsol says. ‘Okay, show me.’

‘Close your eyes.’

Jinsol does it. She’d do just about anything for Kim Jungeun.

She hears Jungeun take in a deep breath. Out of curiosity, Jinsol opens one eye.

And in that brief moment, Jungeun’s lips meet Jinsol’s, and everything seems kind of perfect for a second.

Jinsol stumbles back in shock.

‘Wait. What does that mean?’

‘What do you think it means?’

‘I don’t know, Jungeun. You’re supposed to tell me that.’

‘I like you, okay?’ she says. Jinsol can’t believe her ears. ‘I sing for you. I know my lyrics aren’t as great as yours, but you’re the only reason I’m singing anymore.’

‘Oh.’

‘I’m sorry,’ Jungeun says immediately. ‘I should have asked before I kissed you.’

‘No,’ Jinsol says. She moves one foot in front of the other until she’s close to Jungeun again. Not close enough. ‘Don’t be sorry.’

‘Okay. Then can I do that again?’

Jinsol barely has time to nod before Jungeun’s mouth comes crashing down on hers again, laced with words she’s wanted to say but couldn’t.

That’s how Jungeun tastes: like built-up longing, like lyrics without a melody, and like cheap red wine.

‘You should have said earlier,’ Jungeun breaks the kiss to say. ‘I wouldn’t have cried over you so much.’

‘You cried over me?’

‘Yeah, obviously. Look at you. You’re gorgeous. And smart. And kind. And good with kids. And talented.’

‘Thought you weren’t good with words?’ 

‘Shut up.’

Jungeun kisses her again, so fiercely that Jinsol’s limbs start to feel heavy with want. 

By some force she can’t really control, Jinsol stumbles backwards, pulling Jungeun with her by the belt loops of her jeans, toward the open door of the guest bedroom. 

She collapses onto the bed with Jungeun on top of her.

Somehow, it feels like everything in the world has fallen into place. As Jungeun presses sweet, slow kisses to her neck and jaw and any exposed skin she can find, Jinsol can only wonder how odd it is that you can be at your lowest one second and at your happiest the next.

‘What are you thinking about?’

‘You,’ Jinsol responds without thinking.

‘Oh. Good.’ She turns a little red. ‘As you should.’

Then Jungeun’s hand skims the skin just below Jinsol’s shirt.

‘Jungeun.’

‘What? Is this okay?’

‘Yes, but…’ Jinsol nods her head to the room next to them. ‘Yeojin.’

‘Oh. Oh, you’re right.’ 

Jungeun withdraws and throws herself beside Jinsol on the bed.

‘So,’ she says.

‘My thoughts exactly.’

‘I can sleep here, right?’

‘Of course,’ Jinsol says, even though she hasn’t even thought of asking Vivi and Haseul. It should be fine.

‘In the same bed as you.’

‘You say that like we haven’t slept together before.’

‘True,’ Jungeun acquiesces with a slight laugh. ‘But now it’s different.’

‘You’re right. I hope it can be different.’

‘It _is_ different.’ She doesn’t explain how though.

They sleep face-to-face that night. Jinsol lends Jungeun a pair of sweatpants to wear.

Halfway through the night, while she’s trying to sleep, she feels Jungeun’s hand reach out for hers and squeeze it tight for a second. Jinsol’s heart has swollen double its size.

\---

When Jinsol wakes up and reaches across the bed for the warmth of another person, her hands stay cold. The bed is empty. 

She shoots out of the bed practically. Yes, Jungeun is gone. The weight on her chest which had been relieved for the first time last night returns slowly but heavier than before, so heavy Jinsol isn’t sure she can get out of bed by herself.

She does, somehow. It’s always like that. 

‘Oh, you’re up,’ Haseul comments when she sees Jinsol come down the stairs. She’s in her work clothes now, holding a steaming mug in her hand. Seeing as it’s a Thursday morning, she and Vivi should be rushing around getting ready for work like they normally do, one of them holding Yeojin on their hip ready to be taken along to Haseul’s vocal studio. They’re surprisingly calm this morning. Something must be wrong. Maybe they found out and now they feel bad.

‘How was last night?’ Jinsol asks Haseul as she makes her way into the kitchen for a cup of coffee.

‘It was really nice. How was Yeojin?’

‘She was fine. She always is.’

‘Oh, really? You didn’t need an extra pair of hands to help out?’

Jinsol looks up to see there’s a mocking grin on Haseul’s face.

‘No,’ she says. ‘Of course not.’

‘Someone to keep you company perhaps? Maybe, I don’t know, a certain Kim Jungeun?’

Okay. That does it.

‘Haseul,’ Jinsol says sternly. ‘As I told you yesterday, and as I’ve told you a hundred times, I don’t walk to talk about it.’

‘But---’

‘Leave it alone. Please.’ Her voice shakes at the end of her sentence. Haseul’s face drops and a sympathetic---well, almost pitying look replaces it.

‘Sorry. I wasn’t trying to meddle or push you or anything,’ she says, looking down into her mug.

‘I know. I know, I shouldn’t have snapped at you.’

‘It’s okay, Jinsol. But, uh---’ she gestures to the living room. ‘I think maybe you should go sit on the porch for a while.’

‘Why?’

‘You’ll see.’

Jinsol walks into the living room where Yeojin is fiddling with blocks in her playpen. She picks her up before anything else and plants a wet kiss to her forehead.

‘You’re still really good with her, I see.’

Jinsol jumps so hard she nearly drops Yeojin.

She spins around and finds the owner of the muffled voice. It’s Kim Jungeun, stood on the other side of the open glass doors with a fond little smile on her face.

Jinsol can only stand and stare. Somehow, it just doesn’t seem possible that this girl could be more than one dreamlike night.

‘You’re still here,’ she mumbles, more of a question than a statement.

‘What? Did you expect me to leave?’ she responds with a weak laugh as she opens the door and steps inside.

‘You did last time.’

Jinsol seems to have crossed the line again.

Jungeun looks down at Yeojin with a frown on her face. She reaches out for one of her little hands and holds it in hers.

‘I know,’ Jungeun says. For the first time in… well, for the first time ever, she’s speaking about the way she feels. They’re both not great at that. ‘And I’m sorry. I just.. I didn’t want to stick around for you to tell me it meant nothing. You know? Because it meant something to me.’

‘It meant something to me too. It meant everything to me.’

‘I know, Jinsol,’ she says, squeezing her eyes shut tight. She’s obviously not happy about it, but Jinsol has opened a bottle that’s been shaken and now she feels like it’s going to explode.

‘Why didn’t you just say that?’

‘I was afraid,’ Jungeun admits. ‘I didn’t want to ruin my friendship with you.’

‘I was afraid of that too. When I slept with you. That’s about as ruined as a friendship can get.’

‘Please don’t say those words around my child,’ Haseul intervenes, walking over and snatching Yeojin up out of Jinsol’s arms. 

‘Stop listening in.’

‘I’m not!’ she says, but she makes little attempt to hide the fact that she doesn’t close the kitchen door all the way, for the sole purpose of listening in.

‘If only you knew how many songs I wrote about you,’ Jinsol admits. ‘The ones that didn’t even make it onto that notepad.’

‘Why didn’t they?’

‘Well, a lot of them were goodbye notes, in hopes of getting over you. But I didn’t want to say goodbye. I thought I should, but I didn’t want to.’ She turns from Jungeun to the garden outside. She watches a bird hop onto the bird feeder hung onto a tree branch. 

‘I’m glad you didn’t.’

‘I’m glad too.’

‘And I hope you won’t ever have to.’

‘What does that mean?’ Jinsol asks, looking at Jungeun from the corner of her eye. 

‘It means I’m yours if you want me to be,’ she says, her eyes looking just about anywhere but at Jinsol, her face slowly reddening. ‘And for as long as you want me to be.’

‘Oh. Good.’

‘What, did you forget how to talk again?’ A small laugh. It brings a dumb smile to Jinsol’s face. For the first time in what seems like years, it feels like it belongs there. Her smile belongs to Jungeun, just as her heart does. 

So she doesn’t talk.

She reaches out instead and takes Jungeun’s hand in hers instead, entwining their fingers like they’ve done it a thousand times before.

It’s the first time Jinsol realizes that Jungeun is actually there. She’s not stuck in a dream or in a song or in a love letter. She’s there, in the flesh, hot against Jinsol’s skin.

She doesn’t have to write any more love letters to know that she is very much in love with Kim Jungeun.

\---

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!!  
> ive just made a twt acc to use for my fics so id appreciate if you followed and kept up to date w my works!! follow here: @revebabying


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